An accolade that will eventually rival baseball’s most prestigious honors, NoMaas is proud to present our DOTM Award (figure out the acronym). Each month, we will highlight a player, manager, front office executive, or media member who states or does something that makes you think, “Wow, what a d-bag.” This isn’t about stats or baseball arguments. It’s about pure d-baggery.
If you needed any additional proof that Red Sox fans are the biggest Kool Aid drinkers in all of American sports, please cast your eyes upon following article produced by Eric Ortiz of the New England Sports Network (NESN).
2011 Red Sox Will Challenge 1927 Yankees for Title of Greatest Team in Major League History
Some of the highlights:
– …championship teams are built during the offseason, and Theo Epstein has put together a roster that would make Branch Rickey proud.
– Good luck finding a hole from 1 to 7. Saltamacchia is a bit of a wild card, but the 25-year-old could be ready for a breakout season. And whoever is the starting shortstop — Scutaro or Lowrie — gives the Red Sox one of the toughest No. 9 hitters in the game.
– Besides a potent offensive attack, the Red Sox will boast airtight defense, perhaps the best of any team in baseball.
– Youth, experience and versatility will ride the pine like lions waiting to hunt. Depth won’t be a problem, especially with players like Ryan Kalish, Lars Anderson and Josh Reddick on the farm.
– While the Phillies might be the popular choice as the best rotation in baseball, don’t be surprised if people are singing a different tune come October.
– Every day should feel like Christmas for Curt Young, the new Red Sox pitching coach.
– The way they are constructed, they could surpass the 116-win mark.
– The 2011 Red Sox could accomplish a feat that has never been done. They could unseat the 1927 Yankees as the greatest major league team of all time.
Wow. Just wow. It’s also not surprising that this guy was apparently an MLB editor at ESPN.com.
Congratulations Eric Ortiz of NESN, you are the winner of the NoMaas DOTM Award – New Year’s Edition.
82 Comments
Brandon January 1, 2011 14:26
Seriously, are there any journalists out there today who don’t suck at their job so fucking bad? My God, it makes me sick.
Leisure Suit Larry January 1, 2011 17:14
So true. It’s the only industry I can think of where the majority of the participants refuse to educate themselves about new ways of analysis. They simply refuse to do it. Seriously, has the quality of analysis among the mainstream writers improved over the past 50 years? I bet you could look at articles written in the 1950s/60s and see very little difference to the articles written today.
Easy there January 1, 2011 14:53
Oh my god…
Joba Chamberlain January 1, 2011 15:00
lol.
Brett Pedroia January 1, 2011 15:08
Although I like the youth of the Red Sox bench, they are a little too old for me. I’ll pass.
Small Wang January 3, 2011 15:54
Well done.
BadAssBillyCurtis January 1, 2011 16:14
Are stories supposed to have lumps?
Peter Gammons January 1, 2011 16:20
Damn, even I think that is over the top.
Nick Swisher January 1, 2011 17:15
I agree with Joba and Peter. What a DOTM.
RAB Clone January 1, 2011 19:01
I need RAB’s input before I comment. TSJC would do.
TSJC January 4, 2011 11:29
You racist, Negro hating, collard green dispising, cracker. Go pound some watermelon. OBAMA.
dbod January 1, 2011 19:45
whata douche he probaly sucks theo dick everyday
Red Sawks Nation January 1, 2011 20:01
What does the hall of famer Peter Gammon’s think?
[Censored] January 1, 2011 20:56
Big Ploppy is a hole, and Fuckholez, Lester, and Beckett aren’t even close to Halladay, Lee and Hamels in the NL. They didn’t add anything this offseason, they replaced two departing players. What am I missing? Jarrod Saltalamacchia is on your best team in major league history? Oh yeah, I am gay and Joe is fat.
Chad Curtis January 1, 2011 21:41
Are we sure this article was meant to be taken seriously?
Sensitive RAB guy January 2, 2011 01:45
Lionel Richie & R2D2 were too black for NoMaas
[Censored] January 2, 2011 10:17
I pour an ounce out of my Maneshevitz for those guys.
R2-D2 January 3, 2011 23:51
Shut your dickhole. If anything I’m to spic-ish for Nomaas. i am a Rican. And Lionel called said get off his nuts before he sends his rent-a-daughter to give you pig aids
Hall of Famer Joe Morgan January 2, 2011 01:52
Everyone knows my Big Red Machine was the greatest team in MLB history.
joe mo'gan January 2, 2011 19:28
Hall of famer Joe morgan couldn’t play for my big great red big machine team of the 1970′s
BostonFan January 2, 2011 02:25
I hope to God he gets fired for that
voice of reason January 2, 2011 03:13
please, in boston he’ll get a promotion soon.
Sensitive RAB guy January 2, 2011 05:32
Happy 2011 everyone:
http://m.flickr.com/#/photos/benyankee/5311579436/
BadAssBillyCurtis January 2, 2011 07:14
I think it’s safe to say that Ben Ka-Bak is the biggest loser in the world.
Joseph Pawlikowski January 3, 2011 14:11
I even dislike Ben and I have to work with the guy. FYI his father is a scumbag.
JoeThunder January 3, 2011 20:23
That might have been the best thing you’ve ever posted.
cliff lee January 2, 2011 07:16
sup fellas, this cheese-steak samwhich is de-fucking-licious!
[Censored] January 2, 2011 10:18
Big Bad billy Curtis farted on that cheesesteak
BadAssBillyCurtis January 2, 2011 10:43
Yeah, and I’m going to fart on you next.
Pat Collins January 2, 2011 07:31
I’m a better catcher than Jarrod Saltamacchia and Jason Varitek combined so that statement is just plain ridiculous.
Wilcy Moore January 2, 2011 07:32
My numbers out of the pen in 1927 trump that of any starter on the 2011 Red Sox.
Lou Gehrig January 2, 2011 07:32
Not to too my own horn but I think that I’m just slightly better than Adrian Gonzalez.
MannyGee January 2, 2011 22:12
shitting on the ’27 Yanks is bad JuJu, shithead…
Babe Ruth January 2, 2011 07:34
BURPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Do we even have to compare me to anyone if the 2011 Red Sox outfield????????????? FARTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Waite Hoyt January 2, 2011 07:35
Josh Beckett is a fag.
Herb Pennock January 2, 2011 07:35
Jon Lester is a fag.
Urban Shocker January 2, 2011 07:36
Clay Buchholz is a fag. Also, I have the coolest name in baseball history.
Tony Lazzeri January 2, 2011 07:38
Do you think little Dusty will ever reach my numbers?
Mark Koenig January 2, 2011 07:39
I’m better than Jed Lowrie and Marco Scutaro combined.
Joe Dugan January 2, 2011 07:40
Kevin Youkilis grows out his facial hair to trick people into thinking he’s something other than just a fat Jewish kid.
Bob Meusel January 2, 2011 07:41
I’ve taken shits higher than JD Drew.
Earle Combs January 2, 2011 07:42
My CF play got me into the hall. Jacoby Ellsbury can’t even make it onto a field.
Dutch Reuther and George Pipgras January 2, 2011 07:43
Together we won 23 games for the 1927 Yankees. Together, Dice-K and Wakefield will start 20 games for the 2011 Red Sox.
Miller Huggins January 2, 2011 07:44
Better than any manager in Red Sox history.
BadAssBillyCurtis January 2, 2011 09:33
Are farts supposed to have lumps???
Laura Posada January 2, 2011 11:00
seriously, what the hell is in the water up there?
Sensitive RAB guy January 2, 2011 11:45
Guys, help elect the first blogger to the BBWAA…
Click here:
http://twitpic.com/3lrcey
A big jerk January 2, 2011 13:57
Wow, you Jews know how to party.
A bigger jerk January 2, 2011 14:01
Yeah, party in a gas filled shower maybe.
Sensitive RAB guy January 2, 2011 14:06
lifetime ban?
(seriously, way to kill the fun for everyone.)
The anit-ban January 2, 2011 20:08
Who are you to decide who gets banned? That sounds like something the Nazi’s would do. Let me ask you, Sensitive RAB guy, are you a Nazi? Do you enjoy burning books and prohibiting people from what they like to do? You sir, are despicable.
Sensitive RAB guy January 2, 2011 21:34
1. I think it’s pretty clear the “lifetime ban” above was a joke…because the very next sentence starts “seriously” [you know, the thought behind it WASN'T serious?"]
2. but, regardless, in the next part, I meant: this douchebag already managed to have his name permanently blocked from the site w/ the help of daddy, probably — so why take it 50 fucking notches past where it has to go, and kill everyone’s fun? Next he’ll have RAB blocked or some shit.
Holy shit. Lighten up.
Lighten up January 2, 2011 22:45
Got any pot?
Wise Guy January 3, 2011 01:38
He doesn’t sound much like the Original (orignal) Sensitive RAB guy. I doubt he has any pot.
[Censored] January 2, 2011 15:32
Uncalled for.
Called for January 2, 2011 20:09
Who are you to say what is called for and what is un-called for? How dare you, Mr. Censored, to judge what comments should be and shouldn’t be banned. You sir, are despicable. Also, Boston still sucks.
Villiage Douchebag January 2, 2011 19:25
I have an IQ of 23 and no sense of humor. But even I know that was classless and unncessary. However, I will say that you should start playing “Is this thing loaded?” with yourself. Douche
BadAssBillyCurtis January 2, 2011 20:05
Are guns supposed to have lumps?
Village Douchebag January 2, 2011 22:53
Guns? Oh, I meant his “little douche”. But a gun would be better.
BadAssBillyCurtis January 2, 2011 23:28
Are douches supposed to have lumps???
Wise Guy January 3, 2011 01:39
What would a village douchebag know about classless and unnecessary?
I'm Just Sayin' January 3, 2011 19:06
A comatose individual would recognize that comment as uncalled for, the posters on this site don’t. Interesting.
I’m Just Sayin’
I'm just saying January 3, 2011 20:24
that the dude who posts on here as “I’m just sayin’” is a fucking idiot.
Confused January 3, 2011 20:38
wouldnt that be YOU? Odd duck.
I'm Just Sayin' January 3, 2011 21:02
Nice mouth. I’m sure the favors you performed with it on your Uncle Salvatore are simply divine. Regardless, I’m not interested.
I’m Just Sayin’
Craig Sager January 2, 2011 14:54
I move my bowels at least once a day
rusty kuntz January 2, 2011 17:07
why do people make fun of my name????
Wise Guy January 3, 2011 01:40
BAN EVERYONE
BadAssBillyCurtis January 3, 2011 06:21
Are bans supposed to have lumps?
Call me Crazy January 3, 2011 12:08
…but I don’t think this guy is going to be singing the same tune when he finds out what “ride the pine like lions waiting to hunt” really means. Also, I don’t want to see any locker room footage.
Drinking Bong Water January 3, 2011 12:34
I vomited when I read that article. DOTY candidate.
Joseph Pawlikowski January 3, 2011 14:09
He may not be far off. The Red Sox will jog to the division title.
Sensitive RAB guy January 4, 2011 15:25
You should try jogging to somewhere.
Joeybagonuts January 3, 2011 14:25
Seattle won 116 games a while back. Did they get a trophy for that accomplishment?
BadAssBillyCurtis January 3, 2011 15:09
Are 116 wins supposed to have lumps?
Village Douchebag January 3, 2011 19:09
Do you have lumps? Are lumps suppossed to have lumps? If you farted in the woods and it had lumps, would anyone care?
BadAssBillyCurtis January 3, 2011 20:26
Do lady lumps have lumps?
BadAssBillyCurtis January 3, 2011 20:26
ARE INSULTS SUPPOSED TO HAVE LUMPS?!?!?!?!?!
Past History January 3, 2011 22:31
Not certain. I am certain (and based on me) insults have been known to be the cause of lumps.
Ben Ka bak January 4, 2011 11:31
I’d give my left nut for Theo to be running the Yankees but who wants a Jewish ball?
Village Douchebag January 4, 2011 11:45
BadAssBilly might ask if Jewish Balls are supposed to have lumps, but I dont think so. I dont think any balls are supposed to have lumps. At least thats what Lance Armstrong and Tom Green told me.
BadAssBillyCurtis January 4, 2011 23:04
I’m convinced, the Village Douchebag definitely has lumps. But seriously, folks, are farts supposed to have lumps?