If the Sux keep losing like this I wouldn’t care if they got all their wins against the Yankees. It takes more then 17 wins to make it to the post season :)
Six and half more years of Carl Crawford. Woo Hoo $142 million for a part time player. I don’t know whats funnier the fact that he was benched 13 games into the season or that the fans have predictably turned on him this quickly.
Its not the Red Sox fault that this fine collection of strident white men cannot compete with the breeding done by other minority races to become superior athletes. These fine white youngsters will soon get ahead by using their hard work, guile, and deication, not to mention superior intellect.
Denton from Surviving Grady April 17, 2011 10:04Reply
I’m sure Tito had more than a few games like yesterday’s in mind when dreaming about this season, all snug in his Red Sox footie pajamas and a belly full of warm Bigelow Tea. Seven strong from the starter, Bard in the eighth, Papelbon closing it out. The only run Beckett gave up was an RBI single to Snider because he was too worried about Hill dancing around on second to focus on the batter. Just three hits and a coupla walks with nine K’s for the Commander. Just another day at the office throwing heat and spitting F-bombs.
As giddy as I am about the win, there a few disturbing plays in this game. Jason Varitek, just turned 39 and having played 56 seasons in the bigs, still can’t lay off the high fastball. With bases loaded in the first, Tek chased the high heat on a 2-1 count. Molina took a few steps toward the mound and told Reyes to throw that again and like an obedient dog, Tek chased again. And do we even want to talk about the throw to center field he made on a stolen base? I didn’t think so.
Meanwhile, Carl Crawford sat his buck-thirty-seven-hitting ass on the bench for this one. Jed Lowrie re-stated his case for being the everyday shortstop going 3-for-5 with a homer and two RBI. Youk made an error at third and Ells swiped a base. The end result was win number three and hopefully something to build on.
Today, Jonny K. Lester attempts to extend the winning streak to two games. Won’t you join us?
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For This I Froze My Ass Off?
by Red on April 16, 2011
Battle of the 7.20 ERA Champions!
First things first, shame on me for forgetting that night games in April are cold. Motherflipping cold. In fact, the two most popular vendors at Fenway last night were the hot chocolate guy and the “can I apply fire to your nuts?” guy.
But after staying until the bitter end only to see the boys come up short for the tenth time in twelve games, I realized that while there have been some Red Sox teams I’ve loved to hate — the 1992 Mo Vaughn-Jody Reed Experience comes to mind — I just can’t bring myself to boo the 2011 edition.
Instead, I feel bad for them. Real bad. Especially the new guys. Fenway was supposed to be Nirvana for Carl Crawford, a place with atmosphere and energy light years removed from the sparsely-populated Trop. Instead, the guy looks like he’d rather get stuffed in his locker than face the increasingly less tolerant Faithful. Saltalamacchia, in his first full year as heir to Varitek’s throne, likely fears for his life every time he takes bat in hand, and the standing O that Tek got when he ran in from the bullpen last night can’t make him feel much better. And Gonzalez couldn’t have picked a worse day to go 0-for-4 than the day he signs a $154m extension.
Wish I could put my finger on it, but outside of Jed Lowrie’s bat and The Elf’s usual hellfire, it’s as if everything has gone to shyte simultaneously. And there’s only so many times Pedroia can dole out the “relax, it’s gonna happen” soundbytes before even he starts spiking the team cooler with amphetamines.
20 Comments
Ana April 16, 2011 23:12
Woooooooo!!!!!! WE’RE 3-10 WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
Theo Epstein April 16, 2011 23:16
this is the start of something wonderful
Brandon April 16, 2011 23:34
Chin Pubes is back! Until he gets shit on in his next 5 starts
Roy Keane's dog April 17, 2011 00:37
That photoshop is adorable. Garcia and colon are the new chacon and small…Is Shawn Chacon gonna have to choke him a general manager?
Warner Wolf April 17, 2011 00:54
But knowing 2 of those 3 wins come vs. us hurts.
Russ April 17, 2011 02:35
If the Sux keep losing like this I wouldn’t care if they got all their wins against the Yankees. It takes more then 17 wins to make it to the post season :)
Duck Boat Guy April 17, 2011 01:18
Shit, I have to work tomorrow!?
PeteAbeLuvsJizzToo April 17, 2011 02:44
BRB. I decided to go to an ass licking part with Curt Schilling and his CHB.
ben käbak April 17, 2011 06:59
what is: reason i was put in private school from an early age?
K Last Designs April 18, 2011 14:58
Jew lumps
The Truth April 17, 2011 07:53
Six and half more years of Carl Crawford. Woo Hoo $142 million for a part time player. I don’t know whats funnier the fact that he was benched 13 games into the season or that the fans have predictably turned on him this quickly.
Jimmy the Greek April 17, 2011 08:08
Its not the Red Sox fault that this fine collection of strident white men cannot compete with the breeding done by other minority races to become superior athletes. These fine white youngsters will soon get ahead by using their hard work, guile, and deication, not to mention superior intellect.
ben käbak April 17, 2011 09:06
Youk?
Buttholez April 17, 2011 13:31
Youk is Jewish. Youk would pretend to be Ace Rothstein.
Aaron Guiel April 17, 2011 14:08
Guile? Were you looking for me?
Denton from Surviving Grady April 17, 2011 10:04
I’m sure Tito had more than a few games like yesterday’s in mind when dreaming about this season, all snug in his Red Sox footie pajamas and a belly full of warm Bigelow Tea. Seven strong from the starter, Bard in the eighth, Papelbon closing it out. The only run Beckett gave up was an RBI single to Snider because he was too worried about Hill dancing around on second to focus on the batter. Just three hits and a coupla walks with nine K’s for the Commander. Just another day at the office throwing heat and spitting F-bombs.
As giddy as I am about the win, there a few disturbing plays in this game. Jason Varitek, just turned 39 and having played 56 seasons in the bigs, still can’t lay off the high fastball. With bases loaded in the first, Tek chased the high heat on a 2-1 count. Molina took a few steps toward the mound and told Reyes to throw that again and like an obedient dog, Tek chased again. And do we even want to talk about the throw to center field he made on a stolen base? I didn’t think so.
Meanwhile, Carl Crawford sat his buck-thirty-seven-hitting ass on the bench for this one. Jed Lowrie re-stated his case for being the everyday shortstop going 3-for-5 with a homer and two RBI. Youk made an error at third and Ells swiped a base. The end result was win number three and hopefully something to build on.
Today, Jonny K. Lester attempts to extend the winning streak to two games. Won’t you join us?
0Share
{ 0 comments }
For This I Froze My Ass Off?
by Red on April 16, 2011
Battle of the 7.20 ERA Champions!
First things first, shame on me for forgetting that night games in April are cold. Motherflipping cold. In fact, the two most popular vendors at Fenway last night were the hot chocolate guy and the “can I apply fire to your nuts?” guy.
But after staying until the bitter end only to see the boys come up short for the tenth time in twelve games, I realized that while there have been some Red Sox teams I’ve loved to hate — the 1992 Mo Vaughn-Jody Reed Experience comes to mind — I just can’t bring myself to boo the 2011 edition.
Instead, I feel bad for them. Real bad. Especially the new guys. Fenway was supposed to be Nirvana for Carl Crawford, a place with atmosphere and energy light years removed from the sparsely-populated Trop. Instead, the guy looks like he’d rather get stuffed in his locker than face the increasingly less tolerant Faithful. Saltalamacchia, in his first full year as heir to Varitek’s throne, likely fears for his life every time he takes bat in hand, and the standing O that Tek got when he ran in from the bullpen last night can’t make him feel much better. And Gonzalez couldn’t have picked a worse day to go 0-for-4 than the day he signs a $154m extension.
Wish I could put my finger on it, but outside of Jed Lowrie’s bat and The Elf’s usual hellfire, it’s as if everything has gone to shyte simultaneously. And there’s only so many times Pedroia can dole out the “relax, it’s gonna happen” soundbytes before even he starts spiking the team cooler with amphetamines.
[Censored] April 17, 2011 19:16
Gardner is off to a bad start, so he gets dropped, but jeter can hit 90% ground balls and he hits lead off. Gay.
Buttholez April 17, 2011 23:28
I’m not gay or nothin, but batting 9th is hot.
Jay Destro's Weenie April 18, 2011 14:59
That sounds hot. Gay sex hot.
27 Rings April 18, 2011 11:15
I’m afraid Jeter’s career is over.