If fighting with your mask on is cool, consider him Miles Davis
Tuesday, February 28, 2012 at 10:31 pm by SJK
Our hearts can't handle much more of this. First, Boy Wonder. Then, Anus Mouth. Now C is for Cookie.
Farewell, Captain Intangibles:
After weeks of weighing his options, Jason Varitek has decided to retire, multiple sources confirmed last night.
The longtime catcher is expected make it official Thursday at JetBlue Park, and although the team has discussed a role for him in the organization, a source said nothing will be agreed upon until after his retirement is finalized.
The Red Sox offered Varitek a minor league contract and invited him to spring training, but his odds of winning a job were slim, especially after the team signed veteran backup catcher Kelly Shoppach.
The likely scene for Jason Varitek's retirement presser
the autoplay ads on this site are annoying as crap.
varitek is a pussy.
Firefox + Adblock plus = awesome add free web browsing!
Firefox? maybe in 2010. Chrome is where its at.
Son,have you ever had sex with anyone besides yourself?
I’ll tell you who stole those lunches, it was that damned sasquatch.
With unlimited, beyond your imagination, free porn on the internet? Sex is so 2004. Once I can figure out to stick my dick in one of the holes in my monitor, I won’t even need my hand anymore.
i access porn and surf web wif iStone
NERDS!!!!
Say Shrek, why ya gotta be so grumpy all the time?!?
Donkey lumps
1st ballot hall of famer.
Agreed. Meanwhile, in my expert opinion, Jorge Posada’s overlarge elephant ears will ensure he won’t make the Hall of Fame.
Why won’t Wally take my calls?
COOKIE MAWNSTAH IS HAWTAH, SORRY JASON!!!! I STILL LOVE YAH
The Letter of the Day is…C.
Letter CCCCCCC…
The nice man next to me is a letter C…
u…
n…
t…
He really didn’t wear that mask at his press conference. This is just absurd.
You got lumps
Hey hottie, wanna cum over and watch my Andy Pettitte Yankeeography with me? <333 we'll tweet about it when we're done!
It really just appalls me how these Sox fans continue to worship these average bums. I mean, the guy’s OPS+ for his career was 98! By comparison, Posada was a buck 20, with twice the WAR. He was a shitty to average defensive catcher, who led the AL on numerous occasions in both passed balls and stolen bases allowed. Their argument for this guy is how he’s played in championships at every level of baseball in his life, and he caught 4 no-hitters? Fucking really? If he gets credit for a no-hitter, then he gets credit for every loss his starter gets. And by that record, the Hall won’t be calling any time soon. I clearly don’t know enough about the history of the Red Sox players, if this guy is considered one of the greatest catchers they’ve ever had.
You forgot to add, he’s a pussy.
The thing You left out is, Arod’s a bigger pussy.
Join us for beers later, tubby.
Fuck you chipmunk. You’re the biggest pussy on that piece a shit team.
I wannnnna cum
Get your vibrator piggy.
Do not insult me by comparing that subhuman tweetaholic Andy-fapping piece of trash to me and my brethren
^^THIS
You’re right Joe, Arod is a pussy. He throws a punch like Mike Asskissa.
A Rod’s response was lame though.. when asked about what Valentine said he said to ask his secretary Reggie Jackson about it.
As nomaas has said many times, being a Red Sox fan is a disease.
Well I’ll just tip my mask and call the Yankees my daddy.
Jason may have beat up ARod, but I lay some beatin on old man Zimmer! Ain’t I a pussy?
Bitch please.
I fawted
Rat spines!
I will now proceed to write a 9 paragraph 89K essay bitching about your technique and proclaim myself a fawting expert all while sounding ridiculously arrogant
You make me hard. Sit on my face.
Who the fuck do you think you are comparing that pollack with me?
Ima get my lawyers Kapak, Kapak, and Kapak to sue you bitches.
Cool as Miles, my black ass he’s as cool as Miles.
Where my niggas at?
Can someone tell me why I’m lauded as a hall of fame manager?!
Dude you’re talking about your co-workers at ESPN they just said that so you wouldn’t pout during baseball tonight.
I LOVE YAH BAWBY!!!!!
Make no mistake; that “C” on his chest stands for “catcher,” not “captain”… and is a REAL stretch at that. After Jeter was rightfully given captainship, the Red Sux felt left out and in response, had some blind guy randomly slap a letter on one of the Beantown Clowns. I’m so glad this guy was their starting catcher for so many years. Every team in baseball (minus the Red Sux, obviously) has benefited immensely from it. Leading in passed balls and the worst throw-out percentage year after year… thanks for the memories Varitek; you WILL be missed!
Greatest playah evah. He shaved 1.5-2 ERA off of every pitcher he caught.
He was also quite the catcher in the showers. He even let me take a couple turns.
Bet you didn’t even have to drop the soap, huh sport?
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Does it make you gay if you jerkoff to Varitek’s man chest?
My face is hairier